State of Grace

Last night I Googled something harmless and non-sexual, and one of the results that popped up was for a new, improved sexual purity test. And I'm human . . .

And I scored an 82%. You'd think that's pretty pure, huh? Pretty much to be expected with my Decade Drought. Yeah, it's about what I expected.

The sad part is that the AVERAGE score is an 85%. So I'm 3% nastier than the average person. Which says three possible things. Either

• America is a pretty effin' dull place, or
• The average person is too busy having sex to take sexual purity tests, or
• Purity tests are only taken by hormone-hyped but inexperienced teenagers

Still, 3% nastier. Hmm.

Makes me feel better about myself.