Sticking to the Point

Currently reading "If The Buddha Got Stuck" by Charlotte Kasal, author of the fantastic "If The Buddha Dated," my favorite relationship book ever. (As numerous Amazon reviewers have pointed out, it really isn't about Buddhism, but more a new-age common-sense swirl, but it's a nice swirl. I read it when I need someone to deliver a pick-me-up speech.) While I loved the book I haven't put any of the theory into practice because I'm, well . . . stuck. Hence the new book.

Started reading it in Soupper Salad, and didn't get through the first chapter because of all the internal dialog I brought to the table. Once, for instance, I got sidetracked by the term "personal support system." A system is a process, hopefully with checks and balances. How can support be a process? That seems too fluid and dynamic a word for what should be the foundation of my life. Based on this, I don't really have a support system in my life. Do I need one? What would one look like?

Also occurred to me that one thing the Buddha probably would not do is write obsessively. He wouldn't make endless lists of things to do, instead he would be in the moment and just complete the tasks as they came into being, giving his full attention to each task as it arose. And he probably wouldn't feel the need to write about how the task went, what color the task was, if the task was on sale, and if he could have found a knock-off task if he looked hard enough. Instead he would just empty his mind and meditate, letting the task go since it's no longer part of the moment.

I think my chances of ever converting to this nonreflective religion are nonexistent.

But I also need to read the book anyway, because my personal life is nothing but a re-run of what happened in my past. I keep making the same mistakes, over and over and over. And I'm bitter about some of them, and all that bitterness can't be good for me. Unlike Buddha, I think maybe I reflect so much that the mistakes are just reflections of what I did in high school, or in college. Another chance to relive the same awful experience to the same indifferent ending. I'm immature Alice, stuck in the looking-glass, and I desperately need a way to escape.

Hopefully this book will help me un-stick enough to break the glass.