Sucks
VDay sucks, it really does. Bought Firefly on DVD instead of watching Kill Bill. I've eaten half a pizza and some cheese crackers and some chocolate, but this just isn't working. Passive entertainment (even good entertainment) isn't enough. Food never has been enough.
I want to be shy, and tentative and awkward. I want the start of a relationship, where you're still not sure quite how your lips best fit with his. I want to wonder if it's OK to hold hands. I want to get butterflies in my stomach without feeling guilty.
Valentine's day sucks.
D. said last night that I'm not flirtatious enough. I don't remember how to bat my eyeballs, ask all the audacious questions, or giggle. Gods, I can't see myself giggling at all. Did I ever giggle? She said my clothing is wrong -- it's all too professional. Funny, I didn't think that short denim skirt or that flirty pink skirt were all that serious. I must be getting old.
Old and dry and alone. Is this really what I have to look forward to? A career and a cold bed?
1 Comments:
OK! You simply MUST come to Fort Hood. There are 40,000 soldiers here and only about 1/2 are married.
Send me a "resume" of what you need in a guy... I'll research, send you some pics, try to convince you to pick a few, and the invite you both over for dinner. (Hey! Pick more than one and we'll do breakfast too... coffee in the afternoon... kick one out after dinner and make room for drinks and the next one.)
LOL!
By the way, you're a grown woman... no one ever said you had to fall in love with one before you got them naked. (Did I say that out loud?) Hmm?
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